Starting a new school year can bring a mix of excitement and nervousness for many children. For some, however, the anxiety can feel overwhelming, especially after a long summer break or if they’re facing a new environment, classmates, or teacher. As a parent, your support can make a big difference in helping your child feel confident and prepared.
Here are some practical tips to help ease your child’s back-to-school anxiety and set the tone for a positive school year.
1. Normalize Their Feelings
Let your child know that it’s completely normal to feel nervous about going back to school. Reassure them that many children (and even adults!) feel the same way. Saying things like, “It’s okay to feel a little worried. That just means something important is about to happen,” can validate their emotions and help reduce shame or embarrassment.
2. Start Routines Early
A predictable daily routine helps children feel safe and in control. About a week or two before school starts, begin easing back into school-year routines—such as regular wake-up times, mealtimes, and bedtime. Practicing the morning routine (e.g., getting dressed, packing a backpack) can also reduce stress on the first day.
3. Talk Through What to Expect
Children often feel anxious when they don’t know what to expect. If your child is starting at a new school or with a new teacher, review the school’s layout, daily schedule, and rules together. If possible, attend orientation events or arrange a short visit to the school to meet the teacher and see the classroom.
4. Create a Coping Plan Together
Empower your child with simple coping strategies they can use if they feel anxious at school. These might include:
- Deep breathing or calming exercises
- Positive self-talk (e.g., “I can handle this.”)
- Asking a teacher or counselor for help
Talk through “what if” scenarios with solutions— “What if I forget where my class is?”—so they feel prepared.
5. Stay Positive and Calm
Your child takes emotional cues from you. If you seem stressed or overly focused on their anxiety, they may feel something is wrong. Stay calm, positive, and confident as you talk about school. Celebrate the fun parts—reuniting with friends, learning new things, or participating in favorite activities.
6. Encourage Social Connection
Friendships can ease anxiety significantly. If your child doesn’t know many kids at school, try to set up a playdate or meeting with a classmate before the first day. Practice social skills like saying hello, introducing themselves, or asking someone to play.
7. Keep Communication Open
Let your child know they can always talk to you about their worries. Try asking open-ended questions like, “What are you most looking forward to about school?” or “Is there anything you’re feeling unsure about?” Listen with patience and without judgment.
8. Know When to Seek Extra Help
It’s normal for some children to feel nervous for the first few days or weeks of school. However, if anxiety is severe, persistent, or interfering with your child’s ability to function (e.g., refusing to attend school, frequent stomachaches), it may be time to speak with a school counselor or mental health professional.
Final Thoughts
Back-to-school anxiety is common, but with your support and preparation, your child can learn to manage their worries and build resilience. By focusing on routines, open conversations, and coping strategies, you’re helping them face the school year with confidence—and laying the groundwork for success both academically and emotionally.
– Dave Miner is a licensed professional counselor for Health West in Pocatello, ID. He works with elementary-aged patients through a partnership with School District 25.
